It's really not fair...

...that Simcha Fisher towers over the rest of us with her wit, but this Quick Takes (which she actually wrote a few months ago) is too funny for me to leave unnoted:

...feel free to make a copy, laminate it, and keep it in your ludicrously enormous purse. It will help you respond to people who see your presence as a challenge, when really all you want to do is mail a letter, buy some diapers and few pregnancy tests, or pay the librarian for the books you ruined this week, and go home.

Number 5 sounds a little familiar.